Afraid To Tell

Why can’t they see it?
I know that I have been secretive
But how oblivious can they be?
They are smiling up at me
They have no idea what I need to tell them
My hands are trembling
My heart is pounding 
Perspiration breaking out 
On my forehead
Drenching my palms
Why is this so hard?
What’s the worst they can do?
Tell me no?
They certainly can’t stop me
Disown me?
Yes…they could…
I’m trying to be strong
I’m struggling to hold onto my dignity
I will not break down when I tell them
Will their eyes widen in shock?
Will their cheeks burn red with anger?
Will their hands tremble in sadness?
They will not loose me
Not unless they push me away
I love them
Despite how I may act
Or say
I have to love them
I can’t force myself not to
But they can force themselves not to love me
Will I be alone after this moment?
Will I have no one to hold me?
They are smiling up at me
They have no idea what I am about to tell them
I manage to pull a smile
A small through my dark lipstick
My voice comes through
Yes
It is my voice
“Mom…Dad…
We need to talk.”


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